My dearest Legally Brunette Blog,
Happy birthday. Or, should I say, happy belated birthday. You know I’m not great with that stuff. It’s been a little over a year now to the day that I worked up the nerve to meet you. You big beautiful ray that clobbered every thought standing in your way until I met you.
In this past year, you have gained 25 followers! Kudos. You have received over 1,000 views, and have published 34 blog posts (35 counting this one). But easily measurable and far from sky-rocketing stats aside, you have given much more than you have gained, and for that, I wanted to thank you. For giving me strong, supportive, and witty friendships I couldn’t have ever dreamed of (Shout out to Sunshine and Shortbread– one of the best writers and most appreciative friends of the wonders of an artsy picture I know!)
Thank you for allotting me perspective- that intelligence takes many forms, and that everyone falls victim to puppy-love every once in a while.
Thank you for allowing me to present a facade of being calm, cool, and collected, when in real life we all know that I get just as paranoid about poor grades as every other student, and that as much as I try, I will be never able to accomplish the hair tutorial blog posts I publish on myself in real life.
Thank you for making me jealous of you, and worry whether people like me or you better.
Thank you for incessantly shaking my shoulders until I loved myself back. For making wake up, and realize that God-given talents are God-given for a reason. It is because you must have faith in yourself before you truly can succeed.
Thank you for teaching me to use the words “thank you” more often! And thank you for allowing me to ugly-cry.
Thank you for understanding Daddy, and how explaining the whys and the why nots isn’t really my thing.
Thank you for loving me despite my tendency to use run-on sentences, and reintroducing me to my infatuation with long and pretentious words.
Thank you for letting me cringe as I read my old blog posts. Holy schnitzel! What could I have possibly been thinking when I thought I was being remotely relatable when using the words “Tumblr-esque” and “Insta-worthy” in the same sentence?! I don’t even have a Tumblr or Instagram! God!
Though my growth chart fails to show it during my physical, I have grown. Emotionally. Mentally. And, if we’re really stretching things- physically!
Through you, I seem to fall into a drunken state of bliss as I write, half the time simply letting my fingers pump out my pent up thoughts, with little planning. As I push the little blue rectangle in the top right hand corner of my computer screen a few times a month, displaying ‘PUBLISH’ in all caps, I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders, followed by a weight put right back on.
You make me nervous. You make me question myself. You make me vulnerable and insecure. That’s where good writing is born, right?
Thank you for bringing out my neurotic and control-freakish side. Though, I’ve always had a sly feeling that that has always been hidden among the myriad layers of me.
Thank you for allowing me to feel beautiful. And self-conscious. And witty. And giddy. And bold. And terrified. And intelligent. And obnoxious. And important.
Thank you for nearly letting me fall, but never actually letting me go.
Also, for letting me use the phrase “Holy schnitzel!” with impunity.
Last year, I needed to accept my past.
This year, I need to accept my present.
On the blog in this coming year, you will see my ideas take many forms. From writing down my observations on day to day life, to sharing with you a bit about my passion for public policy, to artsy fashion photoshoots, to admitting my guilty pleasure of writing lists of the colleges I have been waiting my entire life to apply to.
Join me, my quirks and all, on my blog. My truest form of self-expression thus far. My documentation of reality, and straight from the source fact about our new generation, of innovators, go-getters, and occasional dance-craze starters.
So, without further ado,
let me raise a virtual toast.
To my blog,
to my baby,
to my alter ego,
and to my best friend.
Happy birthday, my love.
Keep putting your dukes up for me, will you?
The Legally Brunette